90 posts tagged “indianapolis”

Of course I'm thankful for family and friends but God's mercy and grace are freshest in my mind. Without knowing God I would almost certainly still be lost, guilty, ashamed, and self centered. So today I'd say that I am most thankful for the painful course of events that put me on my knees - a necessary and life saving humbling no doubt. This is my first Turkey day as a believer and it rocks!
-Thanks, Jon Marler (via BlackBerry)

It's a little bit better.
My four month long vacation has come to an end - if only temporarily.  I'm actually thankful to be running around the city (or the country as I did today/tonight) rescuing grandmas, small biz owners, and myspace deprived teens from evil trojans, photo eating viruses, and misbehaving linksys devices.  I've not done any sort of system support for well over 10 years but it pretty much came back to me.  Thanks to a key reference, I got in with a rapidly growing 5 person company as a sub contractor.  My pay is 60% less than what my previous pay was - and comes with no benefits so maybe it is really an 80% pay cut.  Well actually, I've driven a company van to and from home both days so that's a nice bene I suppose.

This is much more
pleasant than meeting self aggrandizing suits, politicing sub-agency directors, and fat cat federal "consultants" in Crystal City or Georgetown.  How could I trade Greenwood or Fishers for Crystal City or Georgetown?  I couldn't, I wouldn't.  I received bigger, more sincere thanks for trivial home pc repairs than for the $3B deal that my former employer won last fall based largely on my technical design.

I mean, how
could I turn down the sweat lady that wanted her sewing machine in the basement to be able to connect to the laptop so she could download her patterns?  What, do you mean I can help someone make clothes or indulge in a lifelong hobby?  Or I could have been stuck in the Arlington VA Hyatt?  Or stuck in that damn circle in Georgetown on a Friday evening.

I was supposed
to go to Spokane on Mon/Tue/Wed for interview and familiarization for job - Followed by The Woodlands TX on Thu/Fri for pretty much the same with another company.  I canceled without going to either employer.  Man what was I thinking?  Did I really think that I was going to put more distance between Circle Face and I?  Of course Circle Face's mom was none to happy to find out that I 'turned down' jobs in TX or WA.  I just don't know what to think about Cherie being so eager for me to leave town - be away from our daughter for extended times.  Tonight, my anger over her attitude towards me and Becca's relationship pretty much boiled over.  I've never been so angry in my life - I was so angry that I called her a "bitch"  - something I never did even during the worst of times with her - but damn, I slipped.  Man was I angry.  I felt instantly like a big piece of shit for calling my daughter's mom something like that.  I know alot of people think that calling people a bitch isn't a big deal but it was (and is) to me.  I'm an alcoholic, an addict, and a failed husband but just not a person that would call my wife/ex-wife/daughter's mom a bitch.  Of course Cherie will never accept my apology and will now use it against me at every turn.  Man, those words just won't go back in my mouth.

I am one of those that has a big fat square 19in TV with rabbit ears. I wasn't looking forward to losing my 3 fuzzy channels ....

Just seeing if anyone is online. Insomnia has me by the short hairs.

Ok, am I inhabiting the planet by myself?

"If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always got."

While I'm looking forward to spending more time with my newly enlarged family - I have to turn my attention back towards crisis management for a few days.

Housing
By begging and promising sexual favors (har har) to the nice apartment complex lady I was able to get my eviction moved from Friday to next Monday. Actually I lied to her but it got me two more days to discover a place to stay. I've located a shelter that is "closer" to my ex and my daughter but I'm hoping for something to happen that will. I tried working with a local agency called Community Action but I don't have access to my last check stub so they can't give approval for helping me. My old company provides check stubs via the corporate intranet - but um, I no longer have a login because I'm no longer an employee ... Duh. I called my former employer's "hr service center" and they can get a copy for me - in the next 3 weeks. It appears that a shelter will be the only way for me to avoid being sleeping in my car. Hmmmm, my car - that's another story.

Car
I did receive a little bit of money from family in KY for my birthday. So I went back to Midas and they pretty much told me that I was driving a death trap. The owner of the franchise pulled me into his office and told me how serious they were. I told the fella that I certainly understand but the amount of money needed to make it safe again was 3 times more that what I had access to.

Money (aka Job)
I didn't write about this last week but I did have 3 close calls on jobs. I started looking for jobs outside of my career and actually started receiving calls. It seems to be "interesting" to interviewers that I'd apply for job that would result in a 70% pay cut. For petes sake - I'm desperate at this stage - my desperation is obvious upon first glance at my resume. Needless to say but all 3 hits resulted in something along the lines of "you'll just leave us when things get better" or "it costs us too much money to hire people that will leave in 6 months."

So ... I've not given up on finding more palatable solutions but I'm shifting gears.

Using the quote at the beginning of this post as inspiration - I'm going to do something different tomorrow to solve my homeless, no car, and no job situation. I've no clue what that is yet but I'm looking for ideas - I'm open to all ideas.

Short of any good comments showing up after this post, I'm hoping the 99 cent frozen pizza that I'm about to scarf down will lead to creative dreaming. Feel free to throw your craziest job getting ideas at me.

So, this weekend I met my mom, younger brother and older sister for the first time. It was nothing short of an amazing. Simply beautiful.

Mom's church hailed our reunion as an example of a miracle. There were several awkward moments as the pastor repeatedly came over and pointed to me and made mention of "... even 39 years later" during his sermon. The phrase "39 years" is a reference to when I was taken from mom on May 18, 1970. While I've accepted a higher power in my life as an imperative to staying clean and sober - my acceptance of any religion or religious dogma is significantly less sure.

Awkward church moments aside, my weekend with my mom, sister, and brother and their families was, to say the least, amazing. This past Saturday joins the birth of my children as best "lifetime" moments.

I'm meeting my older sister and younger brother later today. Of course I've already met my older brother he's the one from this post back on Dec 11 - http://indy.vox.com/library/post/upside-down---they-found-me.html .

Mom's house is a remodeled farm house on 7 acres with woods and a little manmade lake. They put a fountain in the lake so it doesn't ice over. The Canadian geese and the Mallard ducks that inhabit the lake tolerate each other - you know, like Bosnians and Serbs. Quite an interesting site.

Apparently, eating is a big thing down here - and everything has been homemade. Last night we made salsa - best I've ever had - even better than Chilis. I sliced onions and jalapenos while mom worked on tomatoes, garlic, and various colors of other peppers. This much close family interaction is completely alien to me. I thought families showed 15 minutes before meal time and spent less than 2 hours together on holidays. This is even a holiday and they are having a "reunion" of sorts. I know its because of me so perhaps it is a holiday for them.

Ok, um I'm going outside and scare some black birds with a 12 gauge.

I had the brakes "rigged" to work better - still won't drive it with Circle Face though - but I'm leaving now to meet my birth mom. We were going to wait until next weekend - for my 39th birthday to meet. Buuuut, my landlord has a court order for me to vacate on the 30th - my birthday.

Eviction stuff aside ... Its been 39 years and we aren't waiting one more hour that we don't have to wait. Its a 5 hour drive - I'm hopeful to meet her around 7pm Indianapolis time.

PS: my nationality is Irish. Murphy to be exact. That's something I was always curious about.

Circle Face asked me to marry her.

:)

I'm flattered!

I raced off to get to my local McDonalds for a breakfast treat this morning. I say "raced" because I'd dilly dallied almost too long and missed the 10:30 cutoff. I say "treat" because I haven't been anywhere except the library and my apartment for several weeks now.

In the course of pushing a Sausage McMuffin down my throat, President Bush and President Obama emerged from the white house to get in their limo - pure silence, work stopped, eating stopped, pop refilling stopped, even the sizzle of the grill seemed to stop, all employees and customers standing around with eyes locked on the TV. Think this is a big deal or something. :)